Posted on Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Breakfast this morning consisted of a strong coffee,
two cigarettes and another strong coffee. The kids weetabixed, I then woke TAT with strong coffee and joined him for a cigarette. Then I began the process of sorting laundry into colourful piles before having another fag. The washing machine on, I cleaned the kitchen and answered the door to neighbourhood children and watched them scrawl pictures on the driveway with chalk while I had a cigarette. Then I felt tired. I ate a slice of toast and had a cigarette. Deciding that I had to sit down, I began to sort visa receipts by date and study bank statements but this turned out to be a boring task so I had to have another cigarette before going any further. The job was never finished, of course, before long it was time to cook lunch and fix the next load of laundry but not before doing my nappy rounds and having a cigarette.
It occured to me that the floor needed sweeping, so I went outside to fetch the broom
and decided to have a cigarette out there to save time later. I swept. I swept really well even if I do say so myself, lifting furniture out of the way and everything, and found that I deserved a cigarette before mopping. That too went extremely well and was again deserved of a nice relaxing fag and a cuppa tea.
Time for picture cards with Sir Fartsalot and cuddle time with Laughingboy then,
the children pulled grimaces when I breathed in their faces and giggled as I squitched their chubby knees.
A large pan heating to boiling point for pasta took too long to wait for
, so I went outside for two cigarettes. Onions chopped and garlic mashed, carrots peeled and butter melting, I grabed the chance for a quick smoke. Almost ready to serve up dinner… I took it out of the oven to cool while I had a cigarette, and another to reward myself for stacking the dishwasher so quickly.
The lads will appear shortly for a game of poker or two, so I’ll probably
chain smoke a bit and hang around with them until three am or so. Tomorrow I’ll wake with a chesty cough and brown fingertips with a headache and a smelly sittingroom.
Tomorrow I’ll wake with an extra tenner in my pocket, regardless of whether I win a poker game or not.