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Mar 18

Parkour Pops

Posted on Friday, March 18, 2011 in Family, Strange and Unusual

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You know that side-vault thing?  That thing people do to scale walls or fences in one fluid jump?  I’ve always been a fan of that. It’s quite sexy in its own way, that whole ‘I’m unstoppable’ kind of jesture, but I’ve never been able to do it.  That is, I’ve never tried… which means I’ve always been to scared to try.  I fear injuries involving face-plants and potentially knocked out teeth, see.  I blame my dad for that, not that it’s much of an unjustifiable fear, but.

Paddy’s Day was bright and sunshiny this year, we stopped for icecream, Puppychild and Sir Fartsalot and I, and watched the parade move slowly by to the music of screams and vomits from the carnival nearby.  We wandered up and down the sea-front and basked in the hysterics and paid carnival-folk for cheap thrills and people-watched until the sun began to set. This wandering lark was interrupted periodically though, by my need to rest.  I’m not a big believer in buggies, mad as it seems, I much prefer to hold mah babies until they’re big enough to walk as it makes for an easier life (and bigger biceps) in the long run. I’m just not very fit.

It was during one such stop that it happened.  Sir Fartsalot perching on a wall three feet high, Puppychild dancing an Irish jig on top of said wall, me flailing my arms in a ridiculous sort of pattern making noises of relief, a little girl watching us intently from the other side.

“C’mon Grandad!” she said.

An elderly gentleman suddenly appeared from nowhere, took a large stride, then vaulted cleanly over the wall to the little girl.  I’d understand this sort of behaviour if… say… the child was on fire, or was in the path of some heavy object travelling very very fast, but she wasn’t.  He was simply a very limber octogenarian, and I won’t deny a certain degree of arousal on my part.

Even Puppychild was impressed.  “Super Grandad!” she exclaimed, and I agreed wholeheartedly, his freerunning abilities putting me to shame.

Grandads.  They don’t make ’em like they used to!

Bring on the comments

  1. Grandad says:

    I would sue you for this, but I’m not quite sure where to start…….

  2. Jo says:

    Beautiful post! I wholeheartedly agee about the sexiness and the fact that I can’t do it.

    Super grandad indeed. Nice :)

    You need a sling, woman. I have one you could try?

  3. Granny says:

    Get that buggy out of the attic, there is a
    carrier for the six pack under the seat!

  4. K8 says:

    Grandad; Hey, if you’d only sue the right people, you’d be typing on a gold plated keyboard right now!

    Jo; I’ve got a strap-to-me sort of sling, but it’s wicked hard on the back muscles after a long spell of walking, probably because the straps are badly adjusted maybe. I’ve a papoose I made from an old bedsheet but I’d look a bit weird walking around in public with it. So yeah I’d love a go of your one… thanks!!

    Granny; That one has a bocketty wheel and doesnae work. :( I think the attic monsters got at it.

  5. Jo says:

    I also have some mouse eaten buggies in the shed, if you want to see what you can salvage. I know that’s not v attractive offer!

  6. Baino says:

    I can barely run for a bus let alone vault a wall. Kudos for carrying the babies although some buggies are more like supermarket trolleys in their desire to move in the opposite direction to that which you are travelling.

  7. K8 says:

    Jo; I’ve a thing against buggies, they’re very violent in the hands of even the best driver, and they encourage childhood whining where small legs are concerned. He’s nearly big enough to balance on my shoulders anyhow :)

    Baino; Hey, that’s not a bad idea… might rob a shopping trolley for our next jaunt out.

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