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Sep 7

Who is this Murphy lad and who made him King?

Posted on Monday, September 7, 2009 in Family, Rantings

Murphy’s Law really stuck it in and broke it off tonight.

Laughingboy has a feeding machine.  He needs it because occasionally when I fed him by mouth in the olden days he would choke and turn blue, especially where giggles were involved, or distracting lights, or the need to shout took over.  I could not explain to the kid that we only have one hole with which to shout and eat, hence the two cannot be done together, so we built him a stomach extension instead and fed him that way.

I took the bloody thing for granted, didn’t I?

I hooked him up after school, filled his feed bag with yummy Paediasure, set the dose rate and time, and pressed the big red button.  Denied.  I switched it off and on again, and pressed the big red button once more.  Big flashy negative red letters razzed at me without a flicker of sympathy.  Undeniably denied.  I detached the clip at its side and peered at its innards, at which point a piece of broken plastic fell out.  I said some very rude words and Laughingboy laughed.  It’s well for some.

BUT!

K8 always has a back-up plan!  Yes!  In my crafty days back at the hospital when I had become but a shadow in the corridors, I had managed to steal a spare machine for this very occasion!  I laughed heartily as I unwrapped it.  I loaded it up and pressed the big red button.  I got an ‘Internal Circuit Problem‘ alarm in big red letters immediately.

Shite!!!!

I am spending my evening injecting fluid into Laughingboy’s gut at a rate of one 5ml syringe every ten minutes until his quota of 300mls has been absorbed.  It’ll be a Long.  Night.

Meanwhile Laughingboy laughs.  He knows there will be no school for the next 28 working days and he won’t have to fake so much as a raised eyebrow towards the cause.  Fuck Murphy and his laws I say.  Right up the Jacksie.

Bring on the comments

  1. Oh I hate it when a Plan B fails. Dang. Poor you and poor Boy! I must admit it blows me away that something as vital as a feeding machine can’t be replaced for you immediately?

  2. K8 says:

    It was!! As soon as offices started opening today I began making calls… what I had assumed would take weeks to post, was couriered to me within the hour!!

    I’m so impressed :) Sometimes expecting the worst yields lovely surprises.

  3. That’s good news. It must have been a very long night! Why does laughing boy have a month off school?

  4. K8 says:

    He’s back on the bus tomorrow :)
    I assumed (given the usual red-tape time period it takes to order other things for Laughingboy) that it would take a long time to clear a new machine, but I was very happily surprised!

    I wish that same company supplied wheelchairs.

  5. Kirk M says:

    Email me some pics of the unit that the piece of plastic fell out of and I’ll let you know if you might be able to fix it yourself. I’ve worked with 4 different models, some can be cobbled back together at home and others can’t. It’s worth a shot anyway.

  6. Ah, I see. Good lord, that would have been a long month! You must be very relieved!

  7. I find this sheepishly unreal.

    Well done for getting it sorted.

  8. K8 says:

    Kirk; I kept forgetting to reply to these comments, I’m so sorry!!! Damn brain.
    You’re such a handy bloke to know – while the feeding machine is just a simple case of handing the dud over to the courier dude and receiving a brand new one, I have other bits of machinery that may fall foul to the ageing process… if I can call on you then I’d be most grateful!!! I did work out how to fix the filter on his nebuliser last year however, I was pretty damn proud of that.

    Jenny; Yes it would and I am!!! We celebrated with a banana icecream smoothie and clogged the new machine up straight away :)

    Xbox4NappyRash; Unreal is watching your other half trying to manage a fry-up with a newly pierced tongue, only to invent a fry-up smoothie. Yes, beans, sausages, mushrooms, hash browns, rashers and black/white pudding: all blitzed and drunk through a straw. Ugh.
    Turned out to be one of Laughingboy’s favourite meals!!

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