Posted on Sunday, August 30, 2009
in Rantings, Strange and Unusual
Today I smashed the plates and glasses and drove a sledgehammer right into the center of the television set and put all the cutlery in the microwave and set them to cook on full power and threw cans of lighterfluid into the fire and crushed bottles of nailvarnish underfoot and emptied the bin into the bathtub and ripped all the curtains off their rails and threw them in the fire too. Then I used the nesting tables to break the windows and smash up the computer and then I pulled the refrigerator from the wall and tipped it forward so that all the contents spilled and smashed on the cold tile floor and I danced the macarena in the mess.
Then I woke from my daydream and continued stirring the compost-heap.
You know you’re a social cripple when the highlight of your day is cleaning out the guinea-pig‘s cage.
Seriously, things are becoming that bad, I’m starting to develop a crush on Handy Manny.