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Jun 23

Wrong number

Posted on Tuesday, June 23, 2009 in Strange and Unusual

Mobile phones.  Bits of plastic with coilish gizmos inside and fiddly number pads that keep falling off.   Predictive texting that has no sympathy whatsoever for drunken thumbs.  Annoying, dangerously distracting yokes that will most likely kill us all slowly with brain cancer or mid-lane collisions that we rely on for every single bit of numerical order and calendar placement, but that we can’t do without, no matter how obnoxious we feel when we use them.  As with everything however, there is a bright side, in this case, it’s the mis-placed text.  I live for these and I don’t care what that makes me, not even one little bit.

The most recent mis-placed conversation sounded something like this;

Texter – I left the key under the mat so you can get in

Me (bored out of my tree) – Nice one, where do you live and do you have contents insurance?

Texter – ha ha thats funny

Me – I’m serious.

Texter – Andrew?

Me – I sold Andrew for a heroin fix.

Texter – Good for u

Me – I thought so.

Texter – Sorry i got wrong number but glad u are happy

Me – Me too.

Texter – Are you a chick?

Me – Hang on till I check…

Texter – Youre a bit strange arnt you?

Me – Thanks for noticing, yes I am.

Texter – Hows that working out for u?

Me – Better since I met Andrew and made him my bitch.

Texter – Andrew’s MY bitch.

Me – Not any more.

Texter – How old r u?

Me – Don’t change the subject.

Texter – Ha ha bye weirdo have a nice life!

Me – Thanks!  Luv you xxx

Texter – I luv u too xxx

That was the last I heard from him or her, as is usually the case.  Once I think I may have talked somebody down after a nasty acid downer, but I can’t be sure, there are a lot of weirdos out there, present company included.

Two confused people taking random stabs in the dark, a conversation that would never happen on the Dart, or on a public pathway, or at the tills in the local supermarket.  How great this age of communication is!!

How great free texting is, too.


Bring on the comments

  1. Holemaster says:


    I was once mistaken for a Chinese Takeaway. I went with it.

  2. unstranger says:

    Only people can do real weird shit!

  3. Brianf says:

    Texts to the wrong numbers are too too funny. Only ever happened to me once. We txt’d back and forth for a half hour then said goodbye.

  4. Baino says:

    In 10 years of owning a mobile phone, I’ve never had a misplaced text . . .seriously, I’m missing out big time!

  5. K8 says:

    Holemaster; HA! Did you get a credit-card number?! Suckers.

    Unstranger; I don’t know… I’ve seen my cat do some pretty funky shit in her time, I’ve a row of mouse heads on my front doorstep to prove it.

    BrianF; It has to be done. People really need to be kept on their toes!

    Baino; Odd!! Maybe the increased population of Oz lessens the likelihood? Aw. I hope you get one soon. :)

  6. […] Have to love it when the random "sent-to-wrong-number" text turns into a good story. […]

  7. That is freaking hilarious! I’ve made some drunken phone calls but never texts. :)

  8. Oh that’s marvelous–I have a mobile modem that gets a few missent mystery messages but I can’t reply (darn!). I love the text to Dad at the bottom; love his answers…

  9. K8 says:

    Jefferson; At least with texts you can check what embarrassing stuff you’ve written the next day! Not that it’s probably wise to…

    Susan; Caught rapid!!

  10. A friend of mine once called up what she thought was the Galway Gynecological Clinic.

    Male receptionist: Hello
    Friend: Hello, I’d like to make an appointment please.
    M.R.: For what?
    Friend: A cervical smear.
    M.R.: This is a petrol station.

    And how about non accidental random stabs in the dark? Have you encountered the adventure that is Omegle?

    Mr. Hellbrain shows us how it’s done:

  11. K8 says:

    Petrol stations can check fluids too?! In this economy I’m surprised at them.

    Omegle’s strangely addictive, thanks for that link! Fierce handy in times of holocaust I’d imagine.

  12. Voodoolady says:

    That gave me a genuine laugh.

    I like how she replied that she loved you too.

  13. Declan says:

    If you enjoyed that, try It lets you talk to a random stranger! It’s really cool!

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