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May 20

Do Buddhist Monks kill Mosquitos?

Posted on Wednesday, May 20, 2009 in Uncategorized

We got to Bangkok after a fag-free 18 hours of flight, entirely cranky and pretty damn sweaty with it.  Considering this season is off-peak, I wonder what their ‘summertime’ heat feels like.  It’s hot right now.  Very hot. 

After a night of stormy shopping at dodgy street markets in Ko San Road, we moved on to Chiang-Mai, in the North of Thailand.  There we were hustled into sight-seeing tours that began at 6am and involved riding elephants bareback, cuddling fully-grown tigers (but not squeezing too tight), feeling sorry for women who eat, sleep and bathe with 4 kilos of iron coils around their necks (even though our pity is unfounded because they think it the sexiest thing since teabags), rafting down rivers, exploring temples in underground caves, and trying to ignore the harrowing ‘looky looky!’ pleas of small children with friendship bracelets and their mothers with tacky but pretty homemade crafts, all desperate for our Bahts.  We came with empty bags, now they are full.

longneck

While all this was amazing to experience, the lack of sleep invariably led to fiery cranky Sang-Som fuelled arguments at night time, so we were pretty glad to get out of Touristville and down to the Islands on the South-East coast.  Here in Ko-Samui, things are different.  Things are slow, and tourists are black as coffee.  I and TAT feel like milk bottles by comparison.

Night time is the best, when things cool down and Geckos appear with strange and funky wee beasties to serenade you at dinnertime.  Small kids appear with candles and cloth balloons and send them soaring into the stratosphere, the sky flashes every few seconds as thunderstorms loom overhead, yet there is no boom, only lightning, like our own pyrotechnics show.  Occasionally a single clap of lightning will hit a short distance from where we stand and scare the holy b’jeezus out of our eardrums, but that’s all part of the fun.

We’re pooching off to another island tomorrow.

Same same, but different.

Bring on the comments

  1. Granny says:

    A new career as a travel writer looming, great writin K8!

  2. Hails says:

    Sounds fabulous. I want to go to Thailand! May have to investigate the purpose of the bizarre iron coils though…

  3. Grandad says:

    So Bray is off the list for the future then?

  4. Granny says:

    The purpose is to elongate the neck, It’s considered to be very sexy, my neck disappeared years ago so there is somefin to be learnt here……

  5. Grannymar says:

    K8, I’d like to order one of those neck collars – it might hide the lines as deep as ravines on my neck.

  6. Granny says:

    That’s the price you have to pay for keeping slim Grannymar!

  7. Baino says:

    Great to see you actually exploring, so many tourists go to Thailand and spend three weeks in Phuket shopping and slopping. “Same Same But Different” did you buy the T Shirt? Oh and Buddhist Monks might not kill the mosquitos but the Geckos will!

  8. K8 says:

    Thanks mam! I can see how the coils are sexy, also very handy for receiving good television reception maybe…

    Hails; It looks very uncomfortable, they have to sleep spooning with their female relatives for a good night’s sleep, but they’re so proud of how they look – even the tiny kids wear them and seem pretty chuffed with themselves. It’s a bizarre custom, but they probably see kitten heels the same way!

    Dad; The hoop earrings on the pram pushers in Bray come pretty close to the locals here on the Bizarreness scale, but it’s harder to understand their dialect!

    Grannymar; You should see their necks once the coils are removed! They’re like ski-slopes. Very delicate ski slopes!

    Baino; It’s the rainy season in the West, so Phuck that for a game of soldiers. I want a teeshirt that makes Gecko noises!!! I can’t get enough of that sound, it’s so funky!!!!

  9. Holemaster says:

    She’s some neck.

  10. Did you make it as far as Ko Tao?

  11. K8 says:

    No!! Next time? (Ha!)

    Ko Samui and Ko Phangan were pretty much as spoiled as we got, but we made it to Bottle Beach… surely it can’t get better than that?

  12. Ko Tao, small, remote. Almost completely undeveloped compared to Samui. Gorgeous.

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