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Feb 1


Posted on Friday, February 1, 2008 in Family, Jobs, Something to think about, Strange and Unusual

There’s a constant internal nagging stuck on loop in my head.  Every mother feels it in her own way, each worries needlessly if they’re caring enough, providing a good enough start for their kids, knowing deep down that to hug and to keep safe is all that really matters.

With Laughingboy, this feeling has more pronounced lows and highs.  The kid is six years old and completely dependant, meaning that he can’t ward off boredom by kicking a football against a wall, twiddling on a transformer, or even holding a blinking toy.  He just lies there, stuck in the position he was last left in, sometimes for hours on end.

I feel pangs for him when I’m pooching on the net, or fighting virtual baddies on the xbox – I think of how I could be using this time to sit with him and talk or read with him… anything, just to have him aware that I love him and haven’t forgotten him.  It’s stupid, I mean if I didn’t rest sometimes on the long path of motherhood, I’d go crazy, and I know that.

It’s just that when I see him stare into space as he usually does when there’s nothing visual to focus on, I wonder… if he doesn’t know frenzied exercise, doesn’t it stand to reason that he doesn’t know boredom?  I pray that my imagination is so limited that I have no idea of the wonderful stuff spinning through his mind as the hours crawl by, for it’s more than I could stand to think he lives his whole life in prepetual emptiness.

This would have been the case a hundred years ago.  Laughingboy would have been forced into a home or locked in a basement with no-one to hear his giggles, nothing to do all day but stare.

This isn’t a hundred years ago, though, it’s today.  The day of respite, the day of St. Catherine’s.  St. Catherines school, and others like her, are where you want to go if you ever want to meet an angel.

St. Catherine’s fills Laughingboy’s school days with activity; stuff like physiotherapy, swimming and singing.  If you thought Barney was on drugs, these people would Blow. Your. Mind.

This is an era where bad news rules the media.  If you look closely, though, you’ll find that bad news is just the scum on the surface of life’s pond.  There are amazing fish underneath who will bravely land a seized-up Boeing 777 against all odds and save all the lives on board, and fish who will ignore someone’s disabilities and squeeze their untapped happiness out with only the purest of motivations.

I got this photo sent home in Laughingboy’s schoolbag yesterday:


It soothes the crazy like a warm fleece blanket.

Bring on the comments

  1. Deborah says:

    Aw K8! That’s an awesome photo. What a beautiful post – your love and devotion is blatantly obvious – and I am sure he knows it too!

  2. Grannymar says:

    Angels and Saint’s I’d say!

  3. I love this picture. I love this post.

    Nice one.

  4. K8 says:

    Deborah; Isn’t it? It came with another one of him lying on his front surrounded by paint, looking really intense! Both photos were laminated for me. Happy mommy.

    Grannymar; Absolutely. I’ve been trying for years to catch one of those teachers in a bad mood. They must have a screaming room to vent in that nobody else knows about, or something.

    Thanks Gimme! It still somehow misses the point of how much I appreciate this amazing (and totally free) service. Eire rules.

  5. SID says:

    Nice post & photo K8!

    He’s obviously thinking about the mayhem he’ll create as revenge for posting this pic.

    In fact the next time you think of the perpetual emptiness?

    He’s got ya!

  6. Baino says:

    You’re right to take time out – I don’t know how you manage all that you do in a day, you make me feel lazy and inspired all at once. I’m sure his thoughts are a fantasy unto their own and amuse or challenge him in the quiet moments. He’s a gift, a slightly crumpled in the post parcel but a gift nonetheless and you are to be commended as a loving, funny, talented and intelligent mother. The school sounds fantastic and you’re so right, we dwell on the scum and miss the fish.

  7. Granny says:

    K8. What a photograph! A picture paints a thousand words. I see his face light up when you approach him. He even manages a smile for me the odd time. I think he’s only humouring me though. Sympathy for the old Granny.

  8. Oh beautiful boy!

  9. Natalie says:

    Unbelievable post, I admire your strength and wisdom. So much I want to say but just don’t know how, speechless really.

  10. K8 says:

    SID; He’s a forgiving kid though… poor fella’s the victim of my woeful haircutting skills, but he only shouted at me for a day or two. A nasty nappy was my punishment for posting him on the interweb but I let the dog take care of that.

    Baino; Thanks for saying such nice things, but it’s truly undeserved! Most of my days are lazy and uninspired but it all somehow works itself out in the end.
    “He’s a gift, a slightly crumpled in the post parcel but a gift nonetheless” – Perfectly put :)

    Mum; He loves your singing though! He told me you were the greatest granny there ever was. And that he’s sorry he got poo on your couch and lied about it being from his frappachino.

    Wisewebwoman; I gave him his extra XO this morning and got great giggles! He sends XO back at ya :)

    Natalie; Thank you!! The strength and wisdom is just a disguise though, it’s more a case of having a happy mind, or at least trying to.

    Thriftcriminal; Yep! He rocks. Wouldn’t have him any other way :)

  11. Medbh says:

    He’s a handome boy, K8.
    I bet he had a helluva good time with the paint before they snapped the picture.

  12. Ah, that’s a smashing shot. He’s a wee treat with a wise, wonderful mammy . All kids should be so lucky.

  13. Roy says:

    two things K8
    1:if this post had been written before the deadline it would have won best post easy, as it is you’re in with a great shout
    2: WHY aren’t you posting!

  14. K8 says:

    Medbh; His artwork from school is trippy, you can tell he had a ball painting them! Roll Picasso into Van Gogh and you’ll have an idea of what they’re like!

    Sam; Thanks :) I really want to have people know that having a slightly broken kid is a bonus, not a burden.

    Roy; Aww, shucks, man – thanks! I can’t post too often because of my slooowww and expensive dial-up connection. Most days I just be reading other blogs instead of writing on my own.

  15. Roy says:

    Dial up! I’m sensing/smelling mucker! UUUUUUUUUGH

  16. […] no eejit”  I give him my most loving smile. ‘You’re my hero.  My kid goes to that […]

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