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Aug 12

Why do girls pee in pairs?

Posted on Sunday, August 12, 2007 in Humourarse, Little known facts, Taboo

Robert’s on the ball!

My question to him (see last post) was answered with a very good question in turn.

He said that if he was a woman, he’d hang around in the jacks to find out why us girlies tend to pee in pairs.  Well, dude, there’s no need. 

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Here are a few of the many good reasons why ladies double up in the bog department;

1. Leaving the table in pairs gives us a chance to bitch/laugh/gossip/gush about the poor sod that’s left minding the drinks.

2. Standing in the ladie’s queues alone and watching other women preen is quite boring.

3. Standing in front of a mirror re-applying our war-paint is much more fun if there’s someone else there you can scab stuff from.

4. It’s nice to have someone applaud you for not getting the seat wet.

5. It’s handy if you suddenly find there’s no bogroll and you need some fast.

6. Sanitary towel packaging is not subtle.  Sometimes it’s handy to have a girlfriend cough during the ripping stages.

7. The locks on ladie’s cubicle doors can let you down – if there are any at all – and a guard can come in handy.

8. Being with a fellow lady while she pees can be quite bonding.  Think of a piss-partner on a camping trip, you know, someone to stand spread-eagled in front of you for the benefit of hikers.  Conversation is quite often at its best in these moments.  Some ladies even hover over the seat in pub toilets which can be quare’n entertaining after a few beers.  It’d remind you of a dog trying to have a dump on the deck of a ship on rough seas!

9. It’s good to have someone you trust walk behind you on your way back from the jax, to look out for labels showing/v.p.l./toilet paper stuck to shoe etc…

10. Crossing a large room can make a girl self conscious sometimes.  It helps to have someone walk with you and give you a good excuse to smile.

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What do you reckon, girls… have I forgotten any more good reasons, or am I divulging a major secret here for which I should be hanged?

Bring on the comments

  1. […] Update – I’m back to only one thing that I would do. K8 has kindly cleared up some of the mysteries of women going to the toilets in pairs for […]

  2. I was at a pub in Leeds and the womens toilet (I was reliably told, didn’t actually check it out myself!) had cubicles with two toilets in them so women didn’t have to shout over the partition while gossiping. I still don’t (want to) understand why women need to go in teams.

  3. Camron says:

    You’re forgetting the added protection provided when you’ve got a friend handy to help ward off the guys like Robert who like to hang around the ladies’ trying to satisfy their curiousity.

  4. Robert says:

    Sadly the last time I hung around ladies toilets my name was put on a register :( Although I would gladly help a lady to satisfy her curisosity in any way I could.

  5. No. 9: I once went without a rear guard and walked back into the restaurant with me skirt tucked into me panty-hose. Safety in numbers I say.

  6. b3n says:

    Aha! One of life’s greatest mysteries solved. Cheers K8. Now do you know what really hapened in Roswell?

  7. Larry says:

    Perhaps you can also shed some light on the old custom of women dancing around handbags in discos. Does this still happen and if so why, discuss?

  8. K8 says:

    Swiss Job: That’s a pretty good idea, that! It’s just a natural phenomenon. You’re right not to question it, it’s futile really.

    Camron: There is that!! I’ve seen more dodgy foreign blokes hanging around toilet doors *hoping for a pickup* lately alright.

    Robert: Darn’ decent of you, too.

    Baino: Our expression in dis country for that sorta thing is ‘SCARLEHH!’ :)

    B3n: Didn’t you watch Independance Day? Duhhh….!

  9. K8 says:

    Larry! It’s security you see. Handbags are like an external organ to some girls. A little proximity alarm goes off if they’re separated for too long. It also provides a prop to dance with.

    I’m with you mate, that bugs the hell out of me. Especially when you stand on one and you get a rake of dirty looks! I don’t carry a handbag so I’m not really sure. Handbags have a habit of being forgotten under tables, so I just pocket everything. Like 40coats.

  10. Hmm…now we know. It also gives us lads a chance to talk about you lass’. :-)

    You’ve been nominated for a schmoozing award. Read my blog for details. :)

  11. Medbh says:

    Funny list, K8.
    In my wild youth we used to go in pairs to share *ahem* party favors. That was a looong time ago.

  12. K8 says:

    Jefferson! Dude! I dunno what to say! I’ll be right over with a six pack o’ tinnies…

    Medbh; There is always that… *snif*

  13. No one I know will go pee with me. Everyone as old as I am just pee into our Depends garment, and no one is the wiser!

  14. Gaye says:

    I think that list sums it all up, I couldn’t think of any other reason but the most obvious one to add:

    AND, because we can…

    I am really finding it funny that people here (Dublin) smoke heaps more despite the ban and what not, because they don’t want to just go outside alone. So everytime someone says oh I’ll go for a smoke everyone else joins them… In and out and in and out, it’s funny to watch this social phenomenon. :) Just thought I’d add my thoughts on going out in pairs, triples, quadriples, etc.

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